The Secret, the Stage, and the Soil | What I’ve Been Holding Onto

I’ve been holding onto this post for a few weeeks now.

Not because I didn’t want to share it, but because sometimes, life moves so fast that we forget to pause... and honor the sacred in-between.

September has been FULL:

• I announced my first book, The Secret Wasn’t Enough.

• I stood on stage at RISE12, our golden anniversary, and read for the very first time.

• Our team spoke at 2 statewide conferences.

• We educated and brought the community together w/ORN for Stories Save Lives.

• Now, we're preping for an entire month of speaking in October.

• AND I’m preparing to lead our first-ever healing retreat in Florida this December.

These few things, my book, the stage, the retreat... aren’t separate chapters of my story. They’re threads of the same truth I’ve been chasing (and slowly reclaiming) for years.

The truth that we are worthy. Already.

Even when we’re starting over.

Even when the spotlight fades.

Even when we’re still healing.

The Book: The Secret Wasn’t Enough

For years, I did all the right things. Said the right things. Held it all together.

But underneath it? I was still searching.

This book is my raw, unfiltered offering of what it means to heal out loud.

It’s about shame, sobriety, and starting over. But more than anything, it’s about self-worth.

➡️ It’s now available for eBook pre-order. Paperback drops on my 12-year recovery anniversary: December 11th.

The Secret Wasn't Enough shared on stage at RISE 12

The Stage: Rise 12

Two weeks ago, we celebrated a decade of youth-led prevention work with Rise Together.

I’ve stood on a lot of stages over the years.

But this one felt different.

Because this time, I wasn’t just speaking.

I was sharing my story in a room full of people who had lived it with me.

Who saw me stumble. Rise. Grow.

And stay.

That moment reminded me why we do this.

Not for perfection. Not for applause.

But to remind each other we’re not alone.

The Return Retreat: Salt + Soil x Sober Surfers

This December, Anthony and I are hosting our first in-person healing retreat in Florida.

It’s called The Return—because sometimes healing looks like coming back to yourself.

This retreat isn’t about performing or proving.

It’s about letting go. Breathing deeper. Reconnecting with the body.

And remembering that you are whole exactly as you are.

If you’ve been craving space to just be… this is your invitation.

More details + sign-up: www.sobersurf.org/event-details/the-return-retreat

I don’t know exactly what this next season will bring.

But I do know this:

I’m no longer trying to be enough.

I’m learning to remember I already am.

And if you’re on a similar journey, of coming home to yourself. I hope you’ll walk with me.

Whether through the book, a conversation, or a weekend on the coast…

Let’s return, together.

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📩 Leave a comment.

🔗 Pre-order the book.

🌀 Register to join us in December.

✨ Or just share this with someone who needs to hear: You are already enough.